My Experience With Internalized Anti-blackness

In every Black person there is the potential to be a very cancerous cloud welling up in there chest.

I feel it in my chest to. Sometimes it climbs up my throat and into the back of my mind, and grips my brain. It forces me to doubt myself; to look at my current failures and equate them to my very identity, an identity I did not have control over in the first place. It meddles with my judgment, consequentially lowering my performance in almost anything I do. It operates like a cloud that’s been hovering over my head since birth but its vice is rooted within my psyche like a virus.

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Black People And Volume

Up the amplitude to show an attitude

My boys got dank
But it all starts off with a noise complaint
Break it up, cut the grass, while I’m vibin’ in the cypher
Phony puff, puff laugh
And I might add
From the blaze to the stage, Girls on my ass
Enter carefully because the floor is feeling like a trampoline
The ceiling broke up under us, because of us..
Cover us

[Pre-Hook]
And then the cops came

And shut shit down

And then the cops came. That was a small excerpt from a song called “Cop Scame” made by a  hip hop group called Phony Ppl, which is comprised of several Black men.

In this section the artist explains how a noise complaint turns into a situation with the cops. Now that’s what college kids do right? They throw a house party and then the old crotchety neighbor next door (or under them in this case) calls the cops on them.

Continue reading “Black People And Volume”

Just one more responsibility

I’m writing this at 4:33 AM in the morning because I need to. It is pitch black in my room, it is a bit cold this spring due to global warming, and I am not tired at all. However, I did wake up at 1:00 PM in the afternoon today. I have class in the morning but I know I will have a bunch to do after class and I will never get to this so…let me introduce myself.

The name’s Dale.  It’s a simple name but incredibly drab, and I wish it didn’t sound like the name of a white low wage  office worker, or like a chipmunk.

Looking past that, I like talking about the zeitgeist, what’s happening in my contained world, and the Black experience. I like expressing my opinions on these. This blog will basically function as a peephole into my mind’s inner-city sidewalk. I don’t claim to know much, but if you can get past how deadpan my humor can be sometimes I hope I can somehow entertain you with relatable pieces  about social justice, anxiety, and Nicki Minaj’s butt.

Now that you know I have anxiety, we are friends now.